Feeling excluded?

Feeling excluded?

I can relate to the experience of opening up Snapchat and realizing that everyone is hanging out without you. Watching two friends you introduced become best friends and leaving you out or seeing social media posts about brunch plans you weren't invited to is tough. It's easy to feel like everyone else has a close-knit friend group, someone to do silly TikTok dances with, while you're left feeling a little excluded.

Perhaps you've felt left out by your own friends, peers, group, sorority, roommates, team, or even by old friends who have moved on and left you behind. It's important to remember that the people who leave you out aren't necessarily villains. You know that deep down, but you still wish they would think to invite you, consider your feelings, and check in on how you're doing.

It's important to recognize that you have no control over how others view you, but you do have control over how you view yourself. Remember that when God created you, you were not an afterthought. Your value comes from your Creator, not from being included on someone's invite list.

The Bible refers to God as "the God who sees me" - a name given to Him by Hagar, a woman who had been overlooked, abused, and left out. Despite being at her lowest point, God showed up and protected her. This serves as a powerful reminder that even when we feel invisible to others, God sees us and cares for us. We can take comfort in the knowledge that our worth comes from Him and that we are never truly alone.

Not everyone will always be kind, and sometimes even those we consider friends may not treat us with the kindness we show them. However, it's crucial not to let their exclusivity harden your heart. They may think they're too cool to add you to the group text, but you'll find more fulfillment in being the kinder person. Always choose kindness over trying to fit in with the "cool" or “popular” crowd. It's better to be intentional in your relationships than always seeking to be invited.

If you feel left out, remember that there is a God who sees you, and you can be the person who sees others. Consider hosting a get-together where everyone is invited or asking the person who feels left out to lunch. You can even send a random text to the person who sits next to you in class or an old friend you have not talked to for a while. Don't let the hurtful actions of others bring you down. Instead, lift yourself up by reaching out to others and making them feel seen and valued.

Please remember - God hates that you feel left out. God wants you to find friends who sharpen you...which means they gotta include you too. But until He leads you to those people you can trust, always remember God gave you a purposeful life, you have nothing to prove, their exclusivity says more about them than about you, and there is a God who sees you.